無論父怎樣愛我，為我做甚麼，我們總是不能共處；相反，無論我怎樣愛媽，我們總是吵架收場，場面也多是不能自拔。
其實我們大家也愛大家，為何這樣?
Monday, July 16, 2012
Thursday, June 28, 2012
Hope..... Hope.....Hope......
So long that I didn't update. Sorry. I am busy with my life.
Mom just came back from hong kong a month ago. Didn't change much but complain and complain.
We still ask her to go back to Mars. Don't fire her anger to human beings on earth.
Life is not easy for mom and me. We fight a lot. I may become her when I reach her age. I hope not.
Good that dad came back for a little while. King will stay here for another month. Good that we sold the old house have some money for the next 5-10 years if we are not wasting money.
Hope king and ka Ho start to help family little bit at a time.
Hope I will have a simple life.
Hope mom doesn't think she is still a patient shortly.
Hope people faces what they did wrong, stop what they try to cover and don't make any more excuses.
World peace in me and around me.
Mom just came back from hong kong a month ago. Didn't change much but complain and complain.
We still ask her to go back to Mars. Don't fire her anger to human beings on earth.
Life is not easy for mom and me. We fight a lot. I may become her when I reach her age. I hope not.
Good that dad came back for a little while. King will stay here for another month. Good that we sold the old house have some money for the next 5-10 years if we are not wasting money.
Hope king and ka Ho start to help family little bit at a time.
Hope I will have a simple life.
Hope mom doesn't think she is still a patient shortly.
Hope people faces what they did wrong, stop what they try to cover and don't make any more excuses.
World peace in me and around me.
Friday, December 23, 2011
Keep eating, keep eating...
Mom is lacking B12, so dr needs to inject such vitamins manually.
Yesterday morning:
After getting needles from dr. We went for breakfast (notes: mom already had a little bun at home before leaving the house.)
Then we were rushing to hair stylist's home to get hair done. Can't believe she had mood to keep changing the knitting style while Iris (stylist) was telling what was in her mind.
After hair cut, you were saying to grap something to eat before grocery shopping. I couldn't believe, you ordered a small bowl of viet beef noodle but add spicy?
Wow. What an eating day, mom!!!!
Yesterday morning:
After getting needles from dr. We went for breakfast (notes: mom already had a little bun at home before leaving the house.)
Then we were rushing to hair stylist's home to get hair done. Can't believe she had mood to keep changing the knitting style while Iris (stylist) was telling what was in her mind.
After hair cut, you were saying to grap something to eat before grocery shopping. I couldn't believe, you ordered a small bowl of viet beef noodle but add spicy?
Wow. What an eating day, mom!!!!
Friday, October 7, 2011
Your Diet
Dear Mom,
Thank you for taking care of Cookie while I was away.
Thank you for being so nice to Cookie as I know you never want to put too much feeling on him (You don't wanna cry if he is gone!)
Thank you for buying less BBQ pork as you used to.
Thank you for getting less take out food as they have so much MSG...
Thank you for trying your best to eat more veggies
Thank you for buying maltase as I know you can't stop your sugar craving, so I can eat yours sugar instead.
Mom, you take care.... Please NOT to eat sweet that much, Please NOT to eat salty food, Please NOT to sleep more but exercise a bit at a time...
Mom, we love you very much...
Thank you for taking care of Cookie while I was away.
Thank you for being so nice to Cookie as I know you never want to put too much feeling on him (You don't wanna cry if he is gone!)
Thank you for buying less BBQ pork as you used to.
Thank you for getting less take out food as they have so much MSG...
Thank you for trying your best to eat more veggies
Thank you for buying maltase as I know you can't stop your sugar craving, so I can eat yours sugar instead.
Mom, you take care.... Please NOT to eat sweet that much, Please NOT to eat salty food, Please NOT to sleep more but exercise a bit at a time...
Monday, August 22, 2011
Conflict
從小時﹐我便感覺媽媽不甚喜歡我。
因為我的感覺﹐更令我想改變我的想法。媽媽在化療過後﹐她又像過往一樣的生活方式。我嘗試改變她﹐但我竟然變了壞人﹐一個不孝人﹔因為我不准她食甜﹐不准她食一些可能引致 Cancer 的東西。。。最終又是吵架完事。
媽﹐ 你唔愛我唔緊要﹐有時我只是想你明白個事實﹐不是想和你有不開心的事發生﹐但你要明白我有這個感覺是因為你對我的行為。。。
媽﹐請你不要寵壞兩個弟弟﹐因為我想他們成為有用的人﹐不要依賴他人。
媽﹐我感恩Kenneth 是真心幫你﹐所以你不喜歡我常在你左右﹐Kenneth 可以代我。。。
因為我的感覺﹐更令我想改變我的想法。媽媽在化療過後﹐她又像過往一樣的生活方式。我嘗試改變她﹐但我竟然變了壞人﹐一個不孝人﹔因為我不准她食甜﹐不准她食一些可能引致 Cancer 的東西。。。最終又是吵架完事。
媽﹐ 你唔愛我唔緊要﹐有時我只是想你明白個事實﹐不是想和你有不開心的事發生﹐但你要明白我有這個感覺是因為你對我的行為。。。
媽﹐請你不要寵壞兩個弟弟﹐因為我想他們成為有用的人﹐不要依賴他人。
媽﹐我感恩Kenneth 是真心幫你﹐所以你不喜歡我常在你左右﹐Kenneth 可以代我。。。
Friday, July 8, 2011
New Look
Mommy 一身New Look!!! 幾 Colourful!!!
New Yoga pants with cool white/red top shirt and her BBBB (Big Bright Blue Bag).... wow, 幾 型﹗﹗﹗
Mommy 唔知我影緊佢﹐如果唔係我諗佢行得仲型﹗
如果 Mommy 知道我哋係幾愛佢﹐我相信佢會唔亂食野。
希望佢明白我哋唔係管佢﹐只不過想佢長命D有機會見下D 孫 (*我仲未有BB)。。。
*sigh* 食少D雜食當幫幫忘﹗﹗﹗﹗
希望佢明白我哋唔係管佢﹐只不過想佢長命D有機會見下D 孫 (*我仲未有BB)。。。
*sigh* 食少D雜食當幫幫忘﹗﹗﹗﹗
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Ka Ho and Mom
All the time... Ka Ho always like to take pictures with Mom and Mom's smile always go happier.
Not that she doesn't like to take pictures with other.... but .. .Ka Ho always make Mom smile the best. =)
Monday, June 20, 2011
Yeah Mom!
A lot of people asked me about MOM. Mom is doing ok. Her hair is growing really fast. Right now.. .she looks really "Ying"!!!! Very very cool!!!
Don't worry about Mom. She is still alive... and She is getting better...
Will have more her pictures up later on. Please be patience.
Thursday, June 2, 2011
=)
This was taken the day Dad went back to HK.
Dad was trying his best to stay as long as he could with me. I thanked him for doing that. I knew he was super busy, but he still spared the time out for mom.
Mom was happy, but somehow the wound healed outside but not inside, so she had been swollen since my wedding. I was trying to keep her happy, but worries covered a lot of things.
Anyway, she would be fine as Dr. wong is going to see her next week. No matter he did wrong or Mom's condition not as stable as we thought... He would need to fix it. NO MATTER WHAT...
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Post Chemo
This Blog is not going to stop bcoz of the completion of Chemo.
After Chemo, Mom was trying to recover as fast as she can, but I thought something should slow down. I took mom to pick up the "new Breast", but the breast actually rubbed her scar too much and water and blood stored underneath the scar.
It was getting worse during the cruise. However, after we came back and we went to see Dr. Wong. She needed to do the surgery (little one) to suck the liquid out. She did yesterday. It was painful of coz.
Anyway, Mom is resting at home now. Everything should be good.
Now... it is time to change her eating habbit now... For the people who read it... please help Ka Ho and me.... She listens other more than us... =)
May 25 2011
After Chemo, Mom was trying to recover as fast as she can, but I thought something should slow down. I took mom to pick up the "new Breast", but the breast actually rubbed her scar too much and water and blood stored underneath the scar.
It was getting worse during the cruise. However, after we came back and we went to see Dr. Wong. She needed to do the surgery (little one) to suck the liquid out. She did yesterday. It was painful of coz.
Anyway, Mom is resting at home now. Everything should be good.
Now... it is time to change her eating habbit now... For the people who read it... please help Ka Ho and me.... She listens other more than us... =)
May 25 2011
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
~~回想~~
感謝神﹐話甘快就完成療情﹐話長唔長﹐話短唔短。。 好快就完了。。 成個過程﹐我有學識好多!
有時我會諗﹐點解﹐為何﹐原因﹐REASON?? 其實唔需要問甘多﹐我信~ 今次我真係信~~ 當我懶惰既時候﹐返到屋企。。 祢會叫COOKIE 提醒我要保持清潔。。 做事要謹慎!! 要我知道做事不能馬夫﹐有時要人幫我襍手尾既時候﹐唔係事情令別人難受﹐而是過程會令我比人唔放心既感覺﹐一個做大事﹐將來會有更加大既挑戰要我面對!! 謝謝彌比我學會﹐比我經驗~
媽媽既病是我見過最舒服﹐最興鬆的。。有一天我問媽媽~ 比起其他病人﹐我所見的他門﹐嘔﹐病﹐痛﹐哭。。 但是為何媽媽您好似無事發生﹐生活和平常的您一樣呢? 她只答我一個答案~ “神同我一齊行”
我開頭唔明﹐因為我感覺唔到﹐我一直都是在基督教家庭長大﹐開頭覺得都係求安心﹐我只是覺得神治到咳﹐醫唔到病!! 但係我發然我錯了﹐真的誤會了。。
由細到大都會諗﹐點解神要我經歷甘多事﹐甘多難題﹐ 祂放棄嗎? 我同佢傾左甘多次計﹐佢都唔理我架喇﹐信黎做乜﹐一直都轉好耐牛角尖!! 但係神真的比我好多選擇﹐係睇下我點揀!! 好多次都有比答案﹐係我唔理﹐做自己鐘意既! 明知係唔岩既﹐都去揀條錯既行!!
佢真係好勁!! 只不過係半年時間﹐祂一次過答了我所有問題﹐係成世人甘耐問過既問題﹐一次過答晒!! 媽媽見醫生開始到而家我真的見到﹐感覺到﹐感受您﹐最真既係真係摸到!!! 我信!! 我真係信!! 一句 ‘回來不是意義﹐意義是您回來!!’ 我好驚﹐驚得黎又好信!! ’驚‘ 係因為佢答我答得好快!! ’信‘係因為我問祂都唔夠十分鐘﹐祂就出現了!! 我信!!
媽媽講得岩﹐佢一直都係同我一齊行﹐而我揀走開﹐離遠﹐離開~~ 由睇醫生開始﹐到我學識靈氣﹐媽媽改變自己飲食﹐爸爸關心媽媽既次數﹐家姐既改變﹐分享。。 姐夫對我地一家所做既﹐和
有時我會諗﹐點解﹐為何﹐原因﹐REASON?? 其實唔需要問甘多﹐我信~ 今次我真係信~~ 當我懶惰既時候﹐返到屋企。。 祢會叫COOKIE 提醒我要保持清潔。。 做事要謹慎!! 要我知道做事不能馬夫﹐有時要人幫我襍手尾既時候﹐唔係事情令別人難受﹐而是過程會令我比人唔放心既感覺﹐一個做大事﹐將來會有更加大既挑戰要我面對!! 謝謝彌比我學會﹐比我經驗~
媽媽既病是我見過最舒服﹐最興鬆的。。有一天我問媽媽~ 比起其他病人﹐我所見的他門﹐嘔﹐病﹐痛﹐哭。。 但是為何媽媽您好似無事發生﹐生活和平常的您一樣呢? 她只答我一個答案~ “神同我一齊行”
我開頭唔明﹐因為我感覺唔到﹐我一直都是在基督教家庭長大﹐開頭覺得都係求安心﹐我只是覺得神治到咳﹐醫唔到病!! 但係我發然我錯了﹐真的誤會了。。
由細到大都會諗﹐點解神要我經歷甘多事﹐甘多難題﹐ 祂放棄嗎? 我同佢傾左甘多次計﹐佢都唔理我架喇﹐信黎做乜﹐一直都轉好耐牛角尖!! 但係神真的比我好多選擇﹐係睇下我點揀!! 好多次都有比答案﹐係我唔理﹐做自己鐘意既! 明知係唔岩既﹐都去揀條錯既行!!
佢真係好勁!! 只不過係半年時間﹐祂一次過答了我所有問題﹐係成世人甘耐問過既問題﹐一次過答晒!! 媽媽見醫生開始到而家我真的見到﹐感覺到﹐感受您﹐最真既係真係摸到!!! 我信!! 我真係信!! 一句 ‘回來不是意義﹐意義是您回來!!’ 我好驚﹐驚得黎又好信!! ’驚‘ 係因為佢答我答得好快!! ’信‘係因為我問祂都唔夠十分鐘﹐祂就出現了!! 我信!!
媽媽講得岩﹐佢一直都係同我一齊行﹐而我揀走開﹐離遠﹐離開~~ 由睇醫生開始﹐到我學識靈氣﹐媽媽改變自己飲食﹐爸爸關心媽媽既次數﹐家姐既改變﹐分享。。 姐夫對我地一家所做既﹐和
Saturday, March 26, 2011
Believe in faith
For those still follow this blog. Honestly, it is hard to tell you how mom is doing every minute.
I have been busy with Kenneth's new house as well as my wedding. Sorry... I didn't mean to leave you all behind.
Mom is doing so far so good. I am starting to do all "Post-Chemo" tasks.
Need to feed Mom more nutrition. (Notes: Nutrition doesn't mean make my mom FAT)She is actually doing ok. I mean OK as she eats, but little by little. That is a good way to input the nutrition, but not OVER EAT.
Mom is in neutral mood to me as I don't meet her that often. Hope things keep going in this way. I guess Mom should start getting used to my absense. Not that I don't want to talk to her, but actually I am very desperated to be with her, there are just too much things to do. .. can't be with her like I used to in the past 6 months.
People keeps saying I am a very good daugther. I don't really like how people says about me. I am not doing this to my mom bcoz of all these. I do this to my mom bcoz She is my mom. I believe it is what I need to do as Bible put "respect parents" in 10 Commenments...
This is what i need to do, I will make sure my next generation understand "respect" not only to peer group, but actually especially to parents.
Not easy to do specially to the moody parents. It is a learning processes. Yes, Learning processes.
No one born to be parents, to be daugther. We all learn from life experiences, from processes.
Thank you, God.
I have been busy with Kenneth's new house as well as my wedding. Sorry... I didn't mean to leave you all behind.
Mom is doing so far so good. I am starting to do all "Post-Chemo" tasks.
Need to feed Mom more nutrition. (Notes: Nutrition doesn't mean make my mom FAT)She is actually doing ok. I mean OK as she eats, but little by little. That is a good way to input the nutrition, but not OVER EAT.
Mom is in neutral mood to me as I don't meet her that often. Hope things keep going in this way. I guess Mom should start getting used to my absense. Not that I don't want to talk to her, but actually I am very desperated to be with her, there are just too much things to do. .. can't be with her like I used to in the past 6 months.
People keeps saying I am a very good daugther. I don't really like how people says about me. I am not doing this to my mom bcoz of all these. I do this to my mom bcoz She is my mom. I believe it is what I need to do as Bible put "respect parents" in 10 Commenments...
This is what i need to do, I will make sure my next generation understand "respect" not only to peer group, but actually especially to parents.
Not easy to do specially to the moody parents. It is a learning processes. Yes, Learning processes.
No one born to be parents, to be daugther. We all learn from life experiences, from processes.
Thank you, God.
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Uncles and Aunties are home... Good
It is really a relief for mom. The week of my mom's last Chemo treatment that they went missing in Japan. It was very hard for mom NOT to worry during that week.
Anyway, she is ok now... bcoz they are all safe in HK .... =) (FInally went back HK on time...)
Mom is in a healing process.... Hope she is doing great... STill lost most of her tasting... but... I know she will get better.
She is aiming my wedding now... Good!!!!
Don't worry...everyone.. .she will be meeting people soon. Give her sometimes to recover...
Dear God,
Thank you for helping her all these times.... Not easy for me, but you made it easy for her. That is all counted. Please let me know what I need to do for her life. Without you, I won't be able to have the "Vacation" with my Mom with her difficult time. Without you, I know I am nothing... but God... thank you for giving me the valuable time with the one I love. Thank you for letting me realize how much I love my mom. THank you very much. I am praying in the name of Jesus Christ. ~Amen
Anyway, she is ok now... bcoz they are all safe in HK .... =) (FInally went back HK on time...)
Mom is in a healing process.... Hope she is doing great... STill lost most of her tasting... but... I know she will get better.
She is aiming my wedding now... Good!!!!
Don't worry...everyone.. .she will be meeting people soon. Give her sometimes to recover...
Dear God,
Thank you for helping her all these times.... Not easy for me, but you made it easy for her. That is all counted. Please let me know what I need to do for her life. Without you, I won't be able to have the "Vacation" with my Mom with her difficult time. Without you, I know I am nothing... but God... thank you for giving me the valuable time with the one I love. Thank you for letting me realize how much I love my mom. THank you very much. I am praying in the name of Jesus Christ. ~Amen
Friday, March 11, 2011
點解世界變成甘﹖﹖﹖
媽咪一早起身睇新聞﹕日本8.9級地震。
我兩個舅父同舅母剛剛飛到日本旅遊﹐媽咪好擔心﹐因為同佢地失去聯絡。媽咪自己已經身體唔好﹐重發生這樣的事﹐令她心情很差。
現在已經十時左右﹐但仍然不肯去Blood test﹐我真的不知道安慰她。我也很擔心。他們是我比較關係近一點的舅父和舅母。
請繼續為日本人和在日本的朋友祈禱吧。
我兩個舅父同舅母剛剛飛到日本旅遊﹐媽咪好擔心﹐因為同佢地失去聯絡。媽咪自己已經身體唔好﹐重發生這樣的事﹐令她心情很差。
現在已經十時左右﹐但仍然不肯去Blood test﹐我真的不知道安慰她。我也很擔心。他們是我比較關係近一點的舅父和舅母。
請繼續為日本人和在日本的朋友祈禱吧。
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Junk Food, Healthy Food, frustration?
Next Monday will be my Mom's 6th Treatment (the last one).
Good that it is going to be OVER!!!
Mom already prepared for that... This coming friday is her Blood test.
Dear God,
I am recently very busy to help Kenneth's new house, my own wedding, my job searching... and really much putting Mom on the side. I am very sorry. I didn't mean to do it. Thank you for taking care of mom while I was not around her. Thank you for taking care of mom and me while I was very frustrated time after time. Thank you for taking care of mom, me, and Ka ho while we did argued on what Mom should eat and what mom shouldn't eat. Please let mom understand we want her to be healthy, by not eating junk food at all. Please let me know how should tell her? My Lord, I have so many things to work on.... please let me know how to handle my stress and my financial issue by your plans. My Lord... please help. I am praying in the name of Jesus Christ.
~Amen
Good that it is going to be OVER!!!
Mom already prepared for that... This coming friday is her Blood test.
Dear God,
I am recently very busy to help Kenneth's new house, my own wedding, my job searching... and really much putting Mom on the side. I am very sorry. I didn't mean to do it. Thank you for taking care of mom while I was not around her. Thank you for taking care of mom and me while I was very frustrated time after time. Thank you for taking care of mom, me, and Ka ho while we did argued on what Mom should eat and what mom shouldn't eat. Please let mom understand we want her to be healthy, by not eating junk food at all. Please let me know how should tell her? My Lord, I have so many things to work on.... please let me know how to handle my stress and my financial issue by your plans. My Lord... please help. I am praying in the name of Jesus Christ.
~Amen
Monday, March 7, 2011
FINALLY
ONE more week... just one more... week...
Mom will have her LAST (yeah... LAST) Treatment... on Mar 14
Percy
Mom will have her LAST (yeah... LAST) Treatment... on Mar 14
Percy
Friday, February 25, 2011
想去又去唔到。。。
呢幾日Mommy 真係好Tire....
但係佢好想出去走走。。。
我明白有時都幾悶﹐成日要留向屋企....只希望快D 完晒成個Treatment processes, 可以出下街。
我要多謝碧姨星期三知道我有Show 要做﹐All the way 又Mississauga 過來Markham 陪 Mommy. Seriously, 多謝。。。。 !!!!
好喇﹐我要走啦。 Mom 好興奮去裝身﹐我哋去街啦﹗﹗﹗ bye bye...
但係佢好想出去走走。。。
我明白有時都幾悶﹐成日要留向屋企....只希望快D 完晒成個Treatment processes, 可以出下街。
我要多謝碧姨星期三知道我有Show 要做﹐All the way 又Mississauga 過來Markham 陪 Mommy. Seriously, 多謝。。。。 !!!!
好喇﹐我要走啦。 Mom 好興奮去裝身﹐我哋去街啦﹗﹗﹗ bye bye...
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
5th Chemo (Feb 22)
5th Chemo:
Mom got into the CHEMO CLINIC around 9:15am. Yes. Today we were late. Mom didn't really want to be ONTIME heheehe!!! hehee! well.. I know... it is crazy.
Last night, when I asked Mom what time we should be there, the following was the conversation:
Percy: Mom, what time you wanna be there?
Mom: Well, I don't know. I should be there by 9:00am, what about 8:45am?
Percy: Mom, I will not drive that FAST for you as there will be lots of Police in the morning.
Mom: Ok... what about we leave home around 9:00am?
Percy: Mom, do you understand what I am talking about?
Anyway, Thank God for giving me a very smooth and safe trip to the hospital. There were just so many people ignored other on the traffic. I understand. They are not in the mood of driving when someone they know in the hospital.
Mom's veins were difficult to find. So Nurses was trying so many times.... Poor Mom... being poked more than twice. I felt so bad about that. However, Nurses still couldn't find it and end up They need ot put the HOT PAD on.
I unerstand how mom felt.
Anyway, after an hour, finally found the Veins and still working on the IV. Nurses were busy today as Monday and Tuesday patients combined.
Didn't want to talk too LONG... make it simple. We arrived at 9:15am and finished around 2:00pm.
Dear God,
Thank you for giving me another chance to go thru this experience with Mom. Please forgive me not having 100% patience with Mom. I was trying, but she was worrying something that she shouldn't. I was not handling things like that too well. Sorry about that. Thank you for your blessing. Seriously, Mom was worried, but you end up really take care of her one by one. I thank you. I am saying the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.
Percy
Mom got into the CHEMO CLINIC around 9:15am. Yes. Today we were late. Mom didn't really want to be ONTIME heheehe!!! hehee! well.. I know... it is crazy.
Last night, when I asked Mom what time we should be there, the following was the conversation:
Percy: Mom, what time you wanna be there?
Mom: Well, I don't know. I should be there by 9:00am, what about 8:45am?
Percy: Mom, I will not drive that FAST for you as there will be lots of Police in the morning.
Mom: Ok... what about we leave home around 9:00am?
Percy: Mom, do you understand what I am talking about?
Anyway, Thank God for giving me a very smooth and safe trip to the hospital. There were just so many people ignored other on the traffic. I understand. They are not in the mood of driving when someone they know in the hospital.
Mom's veins were difficult to find. So Nurses was trying so many times.... Poor Mom... being poked more than twice. I felt so bad about that. However, Nurses still couldn't find it and end up They need ot put the HOT PAD on.
I unerstand how mom felt.
Anyway, after an hour, finally found the Veins and still working on the IV. Nurses were busy today as Monday and Tuesday patients combined.
Didn't want to talk too LONG... make it simple. We arrived at 9:15am and finished around 2:00pm.
Dear God,
Thank you for giving me another chance to go thru this experience with Mom. Please forgive me not having 100% patience with Mom. I was trying, but she was worrying something that she shouldn't. I was not handling things like that too well. Sorry about that. Thank you for your blessing. Seriously, Mom was worried, but you end up really take care of her one by one. I thank you. I am saying the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.
Percy
Friday, February 18, 2011
Discontinue the Drug
Went to see Dr. Tepperman yesterday. Good that we had a talk with him. He checked and confirmed MOM really had allergic reaction to the Drug. He decided mom should not use that drug anymore.
As mom's perspective, she was afraid will delay the processes and effects how she attends my wedding.
As my perspective, as long as she is ok. She is ok... Doesn't matter about my wedding.
However, Dr. suggested to go back to the drugs Mom took in the past 3 times. He said the result would not have a BIG different.
I was agreed. She is going back to the same drug. That was good in a way, I know Mom won't really have much side effects but only tire...
Mom should be ok. She went to do blood test today and I am sure everything should go smoothly.
Don't worry. She will be fine!
When you have time, you can give her a call. Just a short talk won't harm her that much.
PS: Please don't mention about my prayer couple days ago. She doesn't need to know about my worries. I am ok. Thank you for your prayers and kindness.
As mom's perspective, she was afraid will delay the processes and effects how she attends my wedding.
As my perspective, as long as she is ok. She is ok... Doesn't matter about my wedding.
However, Dr. suggested to go back to the drugs Mom took in the past 3 times. He said the result would not have a BIG different.
I was agreed. She is going back to the same drug. That was good in a way, I know Mom won't really have much side effects but only tire...
Mom should be ok. She went to do blood test today and I am sure everything should go smoothly.
Don't worry. She will be fine!
When you have time, you can give her a call. Just a short talk won't harm her that much.
PS: Please don't mention about my prayer couple days ago. She doesn't need to know about my worries. I am ok. Thank you for your prayers and kindness.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Draining out...
Dear God,
Forgive me not to talk to you earlier. Forgive me going through all those challenges without you. I am not counting you out. I need you, and you know it. I have been very depressed these days.
There are a lot of things happening recently. I am trying to please MOM as much as I can. I am supporting Ka Ho in all directions. I am giving my energy and time to help Kenneth's house closing. I am managing my wedding budget as well as my own family finance.
My heavenly father, I don't want to stress my Dad out as I should manage family finance better, but it seems like I am failing to do it. I am very sorry. Please help me. I do understand there is a lot of things I can't control. I am just trying to ensure my parents have worry-free in Canada side. Our new house is closing, at the same time, I need to clean up our current house, as well as making sure Mom is doing well. I am draining out my energy. I am lost in the money again.
Whatever mom can eat, I will buy it for her. You know I don't like wasting food. But however, I can't take too much carbohydrate in my diet. End up, there are number of food I have to throw them away. I really don't want to do it. It is very much NOT ME! Plus, Ka Ho is not home for food at all time... How should I NOT wasting the food at the same time, I really don't know. God, please help me... I don't want my family move to a new house BROKE. I really don't want to. Please help me to manage the money wisely. This is what you gave us. This is how you let me through ....
Please protect mom. Mom goes easy... she would eat whatever she wants... Please God, help us... help us... help me.... I don't want to think about it ... anymore... please hug me and arm around me... I am using all my energy to make Mom feel better...
Please God, give me some of your mercy... please... I really need it. There are so many nights I cried out LOUD in my bed... not letting Mom knows... I don't have a job to support... family ... People always think Dr.'s family should have lots of money. My Lord, they are so wrong, especially when the Dr always give out free of charge and free drugs to ..... God... please take away my anger... please do so...
In the name of Jesus Christ, ~Amen.
Forgive me not to talk to you earlier. Forgive me going through all those challenges without you. I am not counting you out. I need you, and you know it. I have been very depressed these days.
There are a lot of things happening recently. I am trying to please MOM as much as I can. I am supporting Ka Ho in all directions. I am giving my energy and time to help Kenneth's house closing. I am managing my wedding budget as well as my own family finance.
My heavenly father, I don't want to stress my Dad out as I should manage family finance better, but it seems like I am failing to do it. I am very sorry. Please help me. I do understand there is a lot of things I can't control. I am just trying to ensure my parents have worry-free in Canada side. Our new house is closing, at the same time, I need to clean up our current house, as well as making sure Mom is doing well. I am draining out my energy. I am lost in the money again.
Whatever mom can eat, I will buy it for her. You know I don't like wasting food. But however, I can't take too much carbohydrate in my diet. End up, there are number of food I have to throw them away. I really don't want to do it. It is very much NOT ME! Plus, Ka Ho is not home for food at all time... How should I NOT wasting the food at the same time, I really don't know. God, please help me... I don't want my family move to a new house BROKE. I really don't want to. Please help me to manage the money wisely. This is what you gave us. This is how you let me through ....
Please protect mom. Mom goes easy... she would eat whatever she wants... Please God, help us... help us... help me.... I don't want to think about it ... anymore... please hug me and arm around me... I am using all my energy to make Mom feel better...
Please God, give me some of your mercy... please... I really need it. There are so many nights I cried out LOUD in my bed... not letting Mom knows... I don't have a job to support... family ... People always think Dr.'s family should have lots of money. My Lord, they are so wrong, especially when the Dr always give out free of charge and free drugs to ..... God... please take away my anger... please do so...
In the name of Jesus Christ, ~Amen.
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